I promised I’d always be honest here, for you, reader.
The truth is — I am too depressed — and — I’m hating myself too much right now — for so many things — that I’m not capable of putting my shit out there for you to read.
I’m sorry, but.
I’m not okay.
I will live — that’s a promise.
But, I’m not okay.
And I don’t know what to tell you except that I’m miserable enough to have given up on everything I wished for — through my writing — which may mean nothing to anyone — honestly — to the extent that I don’t believe anything good can happen in this world, no matter how hard I try to help others.
I know life’s not fair.
I fucking know that.
But a little sprinkle of appreciation once in awhile would be greatly appreciated and would go a really long way.
If I have to leave this apartment — I’ll likely end up being the person I was when I moved out in the first place. And I guarantee you don’t want to know her.
God speed ya’ll.
Hopefully I check in tomorrow.